:( I don’t want to date any more.

Let me preface this by saying that I’m really good at not having feelings for people. When I was younger, I was one of those awful girls who fell for every guy who so much as smiled at me… and then I realized how awful I was. Five years of Shane and “real world experience” eventually broke me of that and even when they show a lot of interest, I’m pretty good at keeping people at arms length.

But sometimes I let people in because I like their face and their personality and I think maybe I will be good enough for them. But even then I play my cards right and don’t tell them how much I like them and don’t act desperate and everything right.

And they still fucking leave. Fuck!

I don’t want to date any more. I just want to solidly be WITH somebody who won’t break my heart or make me think I might find happiness and then change their minds

I might be dying of sobriety

It sounds pathetic but I feel really hopeless and alone right now and I can’t really explain or rationalize why. My chest hurts and my skin hurts and my muscles hurt.

And I miss Shane because he could make this feeling go away and I didn’t even have to be fucked up.

I just want something, anything, to get out of this right now. This is the feeling I always run from because once it catches up with me it never goes away

“If it’s true that every seven years each cell in your body dies and is replaced, then I have truly inherited my life from a dead man; and the misdeeds of those times have been forgiven, and are buried with his bones.”

Neil Gaiman, from “Murder Mysteries”

From Smoke and Mirrors: Short Fictions and Illusions

(via liquidnight)

My perfect dream house

omfg my dad thinks satan invented technology

i can’t

I’m laughing so hard

That awkward moment when okcupid tries to match you up with your cousin.


Hôtel Shangri La, Paris, France.

Palacio de Cristal, Retiro Park, Madrid, 2012

Hôtel de Lauzun, Paris, France.

Banque de France, Paris, France.

Dining Room of the Breakers, USA.

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But we are alone, darling child.

But we are alone, darling child.

This is a secondary blog, meaning I can't follow back :c. Keep an eye out for becauseimanastronaut
21. Lonely. Colorado.
This is my personal blog. So there will be late night rambling text posts and this is me apologizing beforehand.
I post pretty pictures here. Pretty buildings, pretty girls, pretty interiors, pretty make-up, pretty words, and just pretty things. And also Persian cats and kittens and bunnies. And sometimes skulls and creepies.